the literal brain and nervous system (Schore, 2019). Futhering a basic tenet of attachment theory, the relationally shaped nervous system then patterns expectations for future relational encounters (Siegel, of diverse clinical approaches reconcile their theoretical constructs with increased neurobiological knowledge, but has also heightened support for more right brain approaches to healing, like play therapy (Kestly, 2014).
I A tenet of IPNB is that our bodies carry our genetics, emotions,
perceptions and memories, both explicit and implicit. Our brains are altered by our interpersonal relationships and by each socio-emotional interaction. Additionally, IPNB assumes: (a) temperament plays a role, (b) relationships mold us into who we are, (c) all relationships change the brain, and (d) our brain is constantly being re-wired, also known as neuroplasticity (Siegel & Bryson, 2020). For the play therapist, IPNB heightens awareness that each child’s play behaviors are layered with pieces of past relational moments, often reaching back generations, and that our responses to their play are not simply co-creating meaning in the present. The child’s internalized versions of us will be carried into their future interactions. There is a growing presence in professional literature discussing how play therapy has historically supported this integration across multiple IPNB domains, even before & Dillman Taylor, 2016).
Much of what shaped my own understanding of IPNB began during the years I spent in early childhood centers and home-based services, navigating development,
temperament styles, conflict resolution
skills and parent-child interactions, primarily for children aged 18-36 months. At the time, I focused on relationally promoting autonomy and positive discipline strategies such as, “connect” then “redirect,” (Siegel & Bryson, 2012) which strengthened my connection with each child and caretaker. I felt effective in managing a group of toddlers with individualized needs and noticed that the children were organically developing prosocial skills. I later learned how these concepts, bolstered by both compassion and connectivity, aligned with Dr. Dan Siegel’s description of the interpersonal: “Something happens between us that is very much related to what happens within us,” (Siegel, 2015, 5:14). This concept was fundamental as I transitioned to private practice as a Registered Play Therapist,
leading to an
cases. This article will illustrate how IPNB informed the creation of a relational point of view that allowed for deeper work in my play therapy room.
A case embedded in my mind that illustrates the importance of IPNB awareness in the playroom is that of 5-year-old Jayden (names and
Interpersonal neurobiology (IPNB) emerged in the 1990s as an attempt to unite several disciplines impacted by the unfolding study of the developing mind (Siegel, 2021). At its core, IPNB articulates how the emotional impact of relationships shapes
CLINICAL EDITOR’S COMMENTS:
Play therapy changes the child, parent, and therapist as the impact of interpersonal
neurobiology extends well beyond the playroom.
details slightly changed to protect the identity of the client), who inappropriate tantrums and impulsive behaviors. As play therapists, we often hear caregivers describe presenting problems in terms of behavioral expectation instead of relational needs. This was true in Jayden’s case as well, and provided an initial insight into his family dynamics.
of hurried footsteps, which echoed on the waiting room floor, followed by those of an adult repeatedly yelling his name. Before our formal introduction, Jayden’s hypervigilant responses to the transition from outside to indoors, to his mother, and to a few minutes of idle time were Upon entering the playroom, Jayden intensely opened each cabinet, swiped its shelves clean, stepped over the splattered contents and quickly moved on. He played with the kitchen set, opening and closing its parts rapidly as he tended to his adult-like chef duties, which was suggestive of routines he had closely observed.
Jayden used all the tools he possessed to let me know about his stored pain. Jayden tended to yell, become aggressive, or terminate the activity altogether if I tried to join him in play. Relationally, Jayden was a study in apparent polarity, but his complex presentation mirrored his relationship to his own needs. He would distance himself in the playroom but make sure he was being watched. He used the musical instruments to compose robust melodies which drowned out the possibility of any conversation yet required an audience. As our transition. Jayden screamed each time I spoke and continued playing. When it was time to leave, Jayden screamed louder, swiped toys from nearby surfaces, threw chairs and ran out of the playroom. Jayden and initiated a game of "catch me if you can". In that moment, Jayden was emotionally dysregulated. His brain was reactive, an emotional state contrary to the gateway of thriving (Empathy & Compassion in Society, 2015).
Post-session, my IPNB instincts kicked in and I reflected on my own feelings of disorganization, a mere glimpse of Jayden’s primary relational needs.
the patterns around In order for my own impacted
nervous system to be able to show up as an effective co-regulator for the next session, Jayden deserved for me to prepare myself to be an effective container for him. This would be necessary for Jayden to
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